Costa Rica 2009

A Flickr set with all our pictures and videos.

Costa Rica 2009

Blade Runner, The Musical

I wrote this back in May and none of my friends thought it was funny. Or if they did, they didn't tell me after I emailed it to them. So I'm sticking it here in case somebody runs across it and appreciates it. Because I like it.

I should explain about the scene near the end. I told my brother I wanted to make a movie where Maggie Gyllenhaal and Kirsten Dunst make out. You know, stictly for artistic reasons.

Based on the Tony and Grammy award-winning Broadway hit musical, I present

Blade Runner, the (Movie of the) Musical

Directed by Spike Lee
Written by Alan Moore and Michael Chabon
Special Artistic Consultants Tim Burton and Katsuhiro Ōtomo

Featuring the hit songs "Running the Blade" by Steely Dan, and "Nothing but a Knife Between Us" by Jonathan Coulton

As the credits lift, we are introduced through a montage of aerial shots and a placard to "New Orleans - 2050: two days before Mardi Gras". A jazz funeral plays a futuristic arrangement of "A Closer Walk to Thee" as it winds through a sci-fi French Quarter. This same jazz funeral appears periodically throughout the movie to tie scenes together (and it's, like, symbolic and stuff).

We track a trenchcoated man winding his way through the band until he finds another similar dressed man eating from a street vendor. These are Deckard (Scott Bakula) and Gaff (Jackie Chan). (Reviews call Chan's performance "The worst miscasting of an actor since Keanu Reeves in...everything). Gaff leads Deckard to his old boss Bryant (Joe Don Baker) who explains, through song, that Deckard must find and terminate "Four or five skin jobs. Give or take." Deckard agrees to do this provided Bryant never sings again.

Deckard and Gaff head on over to meet the creator of the replicants, Tyrell (Richard O'Brien) who introduces them to his assistant Rachael (Maggie Gyllenhaal). The two of them explain about Voight-Kampf to the tune of a horrible zydeco number called "Replicant Applicant", performed by Devo, with a robotic Weird Al on accordion.

Pris (Kirsten Dunst) learns about and then go visit the building of J.F. Sebastian (William H. Macy), which is in the ruined and abandoned former ninth ward (referred to in the film as "the back nine"). He gives her a tour of her apartment, and we get to see his midget and proto robots (which include cameo's by midget Mark Hammill, Peter Jackson, and Ron Perlman). Pris sings "Running the Blade" to explain the situation.

Deckard ploddingly follows the case, dodging drunken frat boys ramping up for the big third act Mardi Gras party. He is visited by Rachael, who learns she is a replicant, and they sing the touching "Nothing but a Blade Between us". He then hits the streets and has his fight sequence with Leon and a trio of backup assassin robots he brought with him for good measure (The Rock and The Rockettes). They sing an Indian dance-pop arrangement of "Helpless Automaton" by Men At Work.

Leon's trail leads Deckard to a sleazy bar run by Vic Vacendak (Mick Jagger). The bar is full of holiday celebrants; it is a long time before Deckard can work his way across the bar. During that time he sees Vacendak make out with Zhora (Rae Dawn Chong) and reasons "You'd have to be a replicant to do that." So he shoots her. Vacendak sings a delta blues song about losing yo' woman to the man, plus yo' woman turn out to be a low-down cheatin' robot.

Back at Sebastian's, Roy Batty (Christopher Walken) arrives and explains to Pris that they are the only two left. They sing the a capella duet "Batty for You". Roy then heads to Tyrell's for their big confrontation. They reprise "Batty For You"; now the chess pieces come to life for a combination battle and dance number on the rooftop of the Tyrell building during a torrential early morning thunderstorm. It is the film's biggest setpiece. As Batty kills Tyrell, the storm breaks and Batty can see the parade beginning in streets below him.

Deckard takes Rachael to Sebastian's where they find Pris. She claims to be a "totally human" prisoner of Batty. Deckard bemoans having to do the stupid Voight-Kampf test again. However, Rachael explains that there is an easier way; she is equipped to detect other repicants by sampling their body fluids. Deckard convinces Rachael and Pris to make out. Rachael says that Pris is a replicant, but Deckard loudly announces that he's not convinced. "You'd better repeat the test." This goes on for several minutes. Deckard eventually allows Pris to live if she'll reveal what Batty is up to.

Deckard rushes off to the Tyrell building; he lands just too late to save Tyrell. He and Batty engage in an epic duel. It's a rooftop-to-rooftop chase above and occasionally through the Mardi Gras parade. Deckard is silent; Roy is singing the maniacal "Running the Blade". Eventually the movie plays about about the same as the original. Deckard slips while jumping from a balloon to a building; Batty saves him; Batty makes his famous speech.

Deckard learns that Rachael and Pris have run off together. He joins the parade, and is lost forever in the crowd. As the credits roll we are treated to outtakes of Jackie Chan injuring himself several times, even though he didn't have any stunts in this film.

Cubs Game #3, 2008

My buddy Mike won 4 seats to the rubber match of the first Cubs home series. In all my times at Wrigley, these were the best seats I'd ever had. It was a totally awesome game. I saw everything I want to see in a game, including:

• Come from behind victory.
• Home team home runs.
• Fukudome doing awesome.
• Marmol doing awesome.
• Kerry Wood's first save.
• Amusing drunken heckler.

Here is the picture set. I annotated. Check it out. Unfortunately, I forgot to charge the camera, so I only caught some early inning action.

I did take one video, of Fukudome doubling to the wall and bringing in the go-ahead runs:

Live Poker Again

This weekend, for the first time in about seven years, I played live poker-room poker again.

I don't know when or how the laws changed to allow it, but there are a couple charity organizations operating out of Chicago that offer real cash games and low-level tournaments. The best of these is Chicago Charitable Games. This is where I played.

I was initially quite nervous about returning to real play, but after about an hour I was right back into the groove, thoroughly enjoying the intense, immersing, calculation of it, matched with the outward-facing bored detachment one has to feign. The one big change between when I played years ago and now is that the average age was much lower than me. The players have gotten much younger and I've gotten older. Also you no longer have to squint through a haze of thick smoke to see the table. Yay!

I wouldn't mention the results of my play were they not so notable, but I played two hands worth mentioning.

Hand #1 - Big bad beat gripe. This was midway through a $25 single-table SNG. The blind structure of these was extremely aggressive, and even though I about starting chips, I only had an M near 3 or so, with 7 or 8 players left. Most people are in the same boat. I have 77 late. Someone limps, a small stack goes all in, and it comes to me. I don't have to think long before I push. Two more all-ins behind me. Literally I'm all in for a chance to make 5x my chips, which would be the most of the chips on the table.

Flop comes 4-5-7 rainbow! The last two big stacks involved both go all in. Hands are A-J, 44, 99, my 77, and one got mucked immediately. Yes!

Turn, unfortunately, is a 9, and the worst player at the table scoops almost all the chips at the table. I lost on a 2-outer. If I win the hand, I could take a nap and still be in the money. Sigh.

Hand #3 - $20 MTT, 3000 chips and 50 players start. I have about 6K in chips one hour in, blinds 300-600. I post my BB just as the clock rings for the next blind tier and the break. I don't want to post an 800 blind instead of 600, of course, so I gripe that I'd already posted and demand the hand. Most people had already got up and walked off and had to be called back (angrily) to the table.

I get dealt 2-7 suited. Whee. 2 limpers plus me. Flop is...wait for it...229 rainbow! I check, first limper bets 1000, second limper is all-in 7500!. I happily call and go from 6K to 14K because I demanded the hand.

The bad news is, ultimately, the tournament paid 5 places, and I finished 6th... Oh well, live to fight another day. It was a fun $20.

I'll definitely be back for more live poker on those rare times I can find the time. It was a blast.

Martin Luther King speaks out about the war

Lest we forget a great speech by a great man.


I wish he were alive to speak out against today's war. But I guess it can't be reduced to a 15 second clip, so it wouldn't make the news anyway.

It's weird, (other than the religious part) hearing this is like hearing the voice in my head. I wonder how anyone can hear this and disagree. I wonder how people who claim to idolize this man can piss on all he stood for, day after day after day. I wonder how Bill O'Reilly, Fox News, and swiftboating would marginalize him today.

Christmas 2007

Every Christmas we've been together, Hiroko and I have held a big Christmas-day bash for all our friends to come to our house. This is because we know a large amount of people who for whatever reason don't have family to spend the holiday with. It's always a fine time. This year was particularly special because we have the new house, and Ren is now a member of our family.

Also shortly before Christmas we had a big night out, where we dined at a fondue restaurant and went to Christkindlmarket. Both were a great time. Hiroko in particular had an unexpectedly great time at Christkindlmarket, despite the deeply bitter cold the night we were there.

We look forward to many Christmases like this one, to come.

Here is a set of pictures from Christmas. A couple from Christkindlmarket, and a few from Christmas dinner. They're sparse because this was during the time when Ren went crazy in the presence of the camera.

Mammoth Cave, 2007

On Thanksgiving day, my mom agreed to babysit for us for two days, giving Hiroko and I a chance to get away for a "date" together. We stayed at a bed and breakfast in Louisville the night before, ate at a fancy restaurant, and had a great time at a piano bar.

But the next day was Thanksgiving. I'd spent a couple weeks trying to find something for two unattached young people to do on a day when everything, everywhere, was shut down. We finally settled on Mammoth Cave. To our surprise, it was quite busy. I guess a lot of other people had the same idea. In particular there were a few Asian families who we talked to who agreed that they were off work and, having no holiday to identify with, had nothing better to do.

Hiroko had never been in a cave before, and I haven't been to Mammoth in years. We had a great time. I don't recall which tour we took, but it was a relatively long one through a constructed entrance. Everything was very interesting. If you're in the area, don't miss it.

Here's a photo set.

Guitar Hero, Hiroko Style

Long winter hours at home with no baseball and with baby means new Xbox. New xbox means guitar hero, the addictive fake-music game for every man-boy who grew up in the 80's. The only greater joy than playing this game is talking your loved ones into playing it. So here you go, videos of Hiroko playing "Heart Shaped Box".


In this second one, she plays while our friend Carmela watches. I'm not sure of the song.

The Chicago Tunnels

Hey, what's the coolest website you'll waste time at today?

If you didn't say "The Chicago Tunnels", you haven't yet clicked the link.

Hello again, ROAR!!

Hello again all monkeys, roar! It has been long time since I blogged, and you must be wondering what's going on in wild world of Mr. Lion. Roar. I have petitioned nature and house channels to do a special on me, but they not interested, roar. Hey, roar, how cool am I?

Lion ladies watch out, I am on the prowl, ROAR!

Back in June, Hiroko and little monkey had to go to Japan for a while. They took plane, roar. This is thing for flying in the air. No thank you, roar! I always land on feet, but...still.

While they were gone, it was bachelor time around the house again. I got a little crazy, roar. Here is me playing video games and eating Hiroko's tea candy, roar:


Also, I got a little crazy with the eating, roar.

And...umm...no comment on this last picture. Roar. Oh, I'm going to need that ibuprofen in the morning. So hard to get open with tiny stuffed paws. Roar!

But just so you know, it wasn't all fun and games. I also helped Bob paint living room and kitchen. I have steady hand, roar. Here is me doing the cornering. Roar!

Despite the good time Bob and I had with the house to ourselves, we are glad that Hiroko and Ren are home. After all, I need to be fed. ROAR!

Cubs vs. Diamondbacs

Here we go. (pic stolen from mlb.com)

Quick Summary: I predict Cubs in 4. I predict it all depends on the first game.

The race to see which team loses to the American League in the World Series begins tomorrow. Thanks to the Gods at TBS, I get to stay up late Wednesday and Thursday to watch 9pm games. But at least my daughter will be in bed by the first pitch. That way I can be good and snookered should Zambrano go south in the 5th inning.

The first matchup for the Cubs is against the worst team in the playoffs, Arizona. Here's some highlights of the matchup:

Starting Pitching: The Cubs have four solid starters. The Diamondbacks have Brandon Webb and...uhh...three other guys. If the Diamondbacks could start Webb every day, they'd bury every team. Fortunately for the Cubs, they can't. Also, fortunately, three of the D-Backs' starters are righties. That's very good news.

Relief Pitching: Both teams solid. No question this series is going to be a pitching duel.

Pitching Overall: D-Backs have the 4th best ERA in the NL; Cubs marginally beat them with second best. Here's a couple stats you haven't heard enough about: Cubs gave up the least hits and pitched the most strikeouts in all of baseball this year. We do have a lot of walks though.

Offense: No question just being average makes the Cubs easily better than the awful D-Backs. Their OBP is a joke. Much has been said about the low HR output of the Cubs this year, which was due to a lot of factors that no longer apply, such as nagging injuries and wind. That's why they turned it around so much in September. Luck was also a factor here; the Cubs had a franchise-record 340 doubles. Add 2 feet to all those hits and there'd be a lot more home runs.

Defense: The Diamondbacks have the best defense in baseball. The Cubs are also at the top of the heap. It's hard to say this will have an effect over one week.

Other Stuff: Both teams have deep benches. Diamondbacks are marginally faster. Cubs are much more experienced.

Summary: Brandon Webb is the giant of the Diamondbacks. The Cubs have a definite advantage in the other games, albeit not a huge one. I really think if they lose the first game, they'll be hard pressed to come back. But if they win it, they'll be sitting pretty. That's why Webb is the linchpin...I think we'll know early in the first game what our chances are.

Either way, you're going to see a bunch of heavy-defense, hard-fought low scoring games. Look for Pinella to try freaky stuff like squeeze plays. If you want to see some crazy games, watch Colorado vs. Philadelphia. Those games should all be blowouts.

My pick: If the Cubs lose game one, they lose in four or five. If they win game one, they win in four.

Padres vs. Rockies

Before I post about the Cubs, I just wanted to nod to the Rockies. I sure thought San Diego was gonig to make it, but they've worked and worked at it and managed to fail to clinch the post season.

Last night's one-game playoff was one of the most incredible games I've ever seen, and I have to tip my hat to the Rockies, even if I wanted them to lose. If you didn't see the last inning, check it out at mlb.com.

Father's Day 2007

Wrigley Field - Father's Day 2007 - Priceless
Originally uploaded by melmanintex

This is a picture from my father's flickr site. Hiroko and Ren were in Japan for Hiroko's father's funeral, and my parents visited me for the weekend. so we all got to go to the game for Father's Day.

It was the only game I saw this year. I was excited to see Rich Hill for the first time (and Maddux pitching in Wrigley again), but he had one of his worst outings and the Cubs fell to San Diego.

Pictured here is the three of us, with the ghost of Harry Caray about to beat my father with his microphone. I've blogged about the statue before.

By the way, Go Cubs Go!

My baby just wanted to let you know: don't worry, the Cubs are going to win it.

Good Morning America, How Are You?

This blog has suddenly seen a huge burst of hits over the last week, from people googling Steve Goodman, and ending up at my old post about him.

There's a recent biography about Goodman out, but mostly I think it's probably Cubs fans wondering about "Go Cubs Go", Goodman's song that's getting a lot of airplay as the Cubs prepare to in the division. (something I'm pretty excited about)

So I thought I'd just say hello to anyone who checks out my blog. Hi, world, and thanks for finally making my blog quasi-popular for a week or two. It's nice to know somebody besides my parents saw this for once.

Obviously I'm not really updating anymore, but if you happen to want to see some really cute baby pictures, check out my daughter's blog.

Er, what?

This video is so much like my dreams, it's scary.


This is what happens when you sign Terry Gilliam and Franz Kafka to your advertising agency. I wonder what focus groups said about the ad. "Hmm...can't you make the girls uglier?"

In case you're feeling dumb today...

This is for you.

Cool Tech: Cicadas in their Prime

This year there will be a massive swarm of cicadas in the Chicago area. I remember cicadas from when I was a kid. After they moulted they'd leave a cool hollow bug shell on the trees all over our yard. You could hear them all night every night over summer, and it's a sound I was so used to that I can sometimes still "hear" it at night when I am drifting off.

Cicadas live on extremely long lifestyles. They spend 99% of their life digging around underground sucking on the roots of trees, before burrowing up one summer, growing wings, and participating in a massive orgy of sex and singing for a few brief weeks before spawning the next generation and dying.

Cicadas have differing cycles depending on the many breeds, but check this out: all cicadas live for a prime number of years. The number depends on species, including 7, 13, and (including the coming local swarm) 17. Nobody knows why, but there's no 11-year cicadas.

So are these cicadas just cool geek types, or is it a coincidence, or what? There are differing theories. Some think they developed it as a survival mechanism to avoid predators. By picking a long prime cycle, they decrease the chance of synergy with cycling predators. For instance, if they'd picked 15 instead of 17, a predator could feast on them by being particularly active every 3 or 5 years.

Another possibility is that they do it to avoid other cicada breeds. If there are 13-year cicadas and 17-year cicadas active in an area, they can avoid running into each other except every 221 years. At which point, presumably, it's insect armageddon!

A time lapse of a cicada moulting.

Sea Otter Love

Very early in our relationship, Hiroko and I went to Shedd Aquarium (among other places) for Valentine's day. Some of my favorite photographs of her or us are still from that day, including this one.

On that day, we fell in love with Shedd's sea otters. While virtually every other creature in captivity manages to look apathetic, sleepy, or miserable, the otters were downright ecstatic to see us. They kept performing, swimming, and diving for us, with these big grins on our faces. It looked like they were saying to each other, "Look, the humans are here (again)! We're so glad to see the humans!"

After that, we kept bringing them up in front of others, and my sister gave us a couple of stuffed otters, who used to greet Hiroko every morning (before Mr. Lion came along). Sadly, every time we've been to Shedd since that first time, the otter exhibit has been dirtier, almost to the point that you couldn't see anything through the dirty glass last time. And the otters have looked fatter, sicker, and sad. It's too bad.

But despite that, I wanted to share this clip with you. It's really cute, especially when they break off and then embrace again. It's the best clip of sea otters you'll see all day.

Countdown to Baseball -- Baseball is here!

As Soriano comes to bat against Harang to begin the 2007 season, I thought I'd post one last bit of youtube Cubs history. This is an audio clip from a famous press release by 1983 Cubs coach Lee Elia. Saddled with a terrible team and angry fans, he lost it in a post-game interview, creating this instant Cubs classic.

The "video" is just some Cubs fan's personal photo collection, and can be ignored.

Warning: contains extraordinarily adult content. Especially for a public figure in a public interview. :)

Tomorrow: some predictions.