Over the weekend, the Cubs signed Jason Marquis, continuing their trend of overpaying for washed-up third-tier talent. To avoid confusion and ambiguity, please not the following:
* Jason is not Jeff Suppan, the other Cardinals pitcher on the free agent market. That guy can pitch.
* Jason is also not the Marquis de Sade, although beat writers' review of his play over the last two seasons has also featured references to torture and pornography.
* Jason is also not the Mercury Grand Marquis, although it was also constructed in St. Louis until it got shipped out when it got too expensive.
* His name is pronounced "marquee" as in, "Is certainly not a marquee player."
Pros: Somehow managed to bat .310 in 2005, which would give him a better batting average than last year's entire Cubs lineup. Seriously.
Cons: Hasn't pitched well in 2 years. Last year he was the worst full-season pitcher in baseball. And then the Cubs gave him a huge raise. No one anywhere knows why.
Wild Card: Strict Jewish. There's got to be a joke in there somewhere.
1 comment:
I laughed so had when the cubs picked him up. Ha Ha. - Albert Pujols
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