Dinner Party Story #1 -- Hiroko's Parents Meet

This is the first in a series where I explain the origins of my family. The first story is about how Hiroko's parents met. It sets the stage for the other two stories, after all.

See the picture on the left? Here's a close up. It's a newspaper clipping from the Seikyo Shimbun, a Soka Gakkai publication from Japan. It's a daily Buddhist newspaper. The photograph is from April 1968, of a gathering of young women from that year. Specifically you're seeing the photo as it's passed around this year's Christmas dinner party. The woman right under Pablo's ear is Yasuko.

Hiroko's father Kentaro saw the picture, and said, "I'm going to marry that woman!" So he sought out someone who knew her, and got himself introduced. At the time he was 31 and she was 23, but he knew that wasn't exactly an asset, so he told her he was 29. He waited until it didn't matter before finally confessing.

One big problem early in their relationship was that Kentaro accidentally went to jail. It's sort of a long story, but at this time in Japanese history, the Soka Gakkai was participating heavily to establish an election reform political party. The local police were on the established government's side and every year they'd round up a lot of Gakkai members on drummed up charges after the election. In 1968, Kentaro's mother had hosted some political operations at her house, so the police arrested her for election fraud. Kentaro, ignorant of the law, went to the police station and told them that his mother was frail and couldn't be in prison, and offered to change places with her...so the police arrested him as an accomplice. Kentaro refused to confess, saying "truth is truth". 21 days later, he was released and cleared of all charges (given that there was no actual evidence against him). The fact that Kentaro stood up for justice impressed Yasuko.

Kentaro and Yasuko were married 5 months after they met (which was reasonable at that time), in late September. They proceeded to have four children, all daughters, named Toshiko, Mayumi, Nobuko, and Hiroko, who was the last.

One month before Hiroko was due, Yasuko was cleaning the bathtub when her water broke. She got an emergency taxi ride to the hospital and Hiroko was born. Hiroko had spina bifida, a disorder in which one's spine is split at the tail end, and spinal fluid is leaking out. Given the gravity of her disorder, she should have died or been severely crippled. Due to the power of her parents' faith and their determination to have a healthy daughter, they saw her through 7-8 major surgeries, and Hiroko was in and out of hospitals for the first six years of her life.

Two different times, doctors told Yasuko that Hiroko required major surgery which would permanently cripple her to survive. Both times Yasuko refused to comply and prayed deeply for the best result. Both times, Hiroko's condition improved until she didn't need those surgeries.

As a result of seeing Hiroko through these surgeries, she became especially precious to her parents as an example of the result of their faith. I believe this has given Hiroko the sense of mission that's led her to focus on and empathise with the suffering of others. It also is something to keep in mind when you read the story of the first time I met her parents, which I promise to post soon.

Thanks for listening!

The Human Revolution

At the start of the year I set a lot of ambitious goals for myself. Some of them got invalidated by the pregnancy, but mostly I'm very happy with how my year has progressed. I used to pooh-pooh setting annual goals like this, but I've accomplished a lot of big things in my life by seeing them through. A lot of times with the bigger goals, you can get halfway through something and forget why you wanted to do it, or it will seem impossible. You sort of lose yourself in the middle.

As part of my responsibilities as Region Gajokai Chief, I made it my goal this year to read The Human Revolution. At 2000 pages of historical novelization, sometimes heavy with explanations of logistics and Japanese history, it was difficult. It was also one of the most rewarding reads I've ever had.

It's rare to read something that I can say really changes my life and outlook. I've read a lot of classics of literature that I can say have enriched me and left me feeling great, but even those books virtually never changed me on a fundamental level. They didn't inspire me to want to go out and change the world for a better place. This book did that.

Very briefly, it's the story of the origin and growth of the Soka Gakkai, from 1944 to 1960. Josei Toda, a teacher, publisher, and Buddhist, was jailed during the war for refusing to follow state Shinto. Instead, he opted to be jailed and tortured to keep alive the flame of a sect of Buddhism which virtually no one still cared about. After the war, despite fundamental sickness and poverty, he created and grew an organization 750,000 strong of believers. His chief student (and the serial's author), Daisaku Ikeda, then took the reins and grew the organization to the international religious movement it is today, 13 million strong.

I think it's a rare and wonderful thing to have such a candid and complete history of a religion and its key figures. It candidly describes not just their challenges and successes, but stumblings, doubts, and failures as well. It contains central messages that peace is possible, that every person can grow and change no matter what their past or origin, and that it is all up to us.

I have always been proud to be part of a group that's so empowering and offers its members so much power and opportunity to practice their own Revolution. Having this complete view of its history has strengthened this view. I wish everyone could read this. Particularly, every idealistic youth who is looking to save people from sorrow and yearning to find the best way forward.

Dinner Party Stories

Every year since I bought my first house, we've had over a host of people for a potluck on/near Christmas who for whatever reason don't get to be with their family. It's always a great time with great conversation, and I get a great meal out of the deal. Since we know in particular a lot of young Japanese folk in Chicago through the Soka Gakkai, there's always a lot of people. There have been lots of others over the years, but this year it happened to be mostly Japanese young women. I've put together a full picture set here.

One thing that happened at dinner was we got to telling stories about how we met. This included Hiroko and I telling the story of how we got together, and Yasuko (my mother in law) telling the story of how she and Kentaro got together, and also about my trip to Japan and meeting Kentaro's father. These were all such great stories that I decided I'd better blog about them over the coming days. with everything else going on for me to blog about (or, alternatively get too busy to blog about) I don't know specifically when they'll come, but it's something I hope you'll look forward to.

It's All About the Lions, Baby

What is up, my homeys, roar! Mr. Lion in the house! Some day when I run your country, I will put myself on your money, like this, ROAR! Then you can all think of me when you are doing your money thing. Lions don't have money, roar. We want something, we take it, ROAR!

Lately I have learned there is mouse in house. House has mouse, roar! As chief lion and wild animal defense expert of house, I am greatly concerned, ROAR!! Something must be done before you monkeys start to think I have gone soft. Well, obviously as stuffed lion, I am always soft, but you know what I mean, roar.

Mouse has eaten some crackers and noodles in cabinets, roar. Mouse also ate snickers bars in box by sofa, roar! Yes, it was definitely mouse that ate delicious candy, and not lion during middle of the night when everyone was asleep, roar. Rest assured about that. I should say, I assume candy was delicious. As definitely creature who did not eat candy, I wouldn't know, roar.

Mouse also left droppings, roar. That is gross, ROAR! Mr. Lion never leaves droppings. It is one more advantage to having lion who is stuffed as your friend.

Anyway, Bob put traps with peanut butter all over house. Let me tell you something about these traps-they can definitely hurt your paws, roar! You definitely don't want to lick that peanut butter, no matter how...sweet and tempting...ROAR! Of course we will not need traps, but just to make Bob feel good, I will put mice I catch inside the traps, so he thinks it is him, roar. He will think I am being lazy and sleeping all night. But I am definitely out catching mice, roar! I'm just so stealthy you can't even hear me stalking. I'm, like, ninja lion. ROOOAR!

Fun with Yasuko

My awesome mother in law Yasuko is in town. You can see pics and read some about it at my blog for my daughter. I thought I'd mention that among the gifts, yasuko borough summer kimonos (jinbei) for gifts for a lot of people. Here's a picture of me wearing my top.

After the gifts on Wednesday, we took Yasuko to eat at Joy Yee's in Chinatown, and then drove up Michigan so she could see the Christmas activity on the Magnificent Mile.

Also last night, in celebration of a difficult work week and not having to get up in the morning, I set up Battlelore. To my surprise, Yasuko took a great interest. She help me sort the pieces and board, and I explained the rules to her as best I could, given the rulebook is 80 pages long and we speak different languages... But I know the colors and numbers, so I could explain a lot. She got to roll all the dice. She definitely at least understood the magic (lore) deck, the deck for determining what the armies do (command cards), and who was attacking who. I even tried to explain the support rules, but the language barrier dropped. I played both sides, but at the end the side she was sitting at won, so she declared victory over me.

Yasuko also promised to teach me a version of Japanese chess. I'll keep you posted.

Last Gajokai shift

Last Sunday was my very last Gajokai shift. Three hours on a Sunday is always exciting, and I found myself reflecting that, after four years and thousands of hours managing the culture center for the SGI, it was a pretty typical shift. I think it's in the spirit of doing Gajokai that I was about to go out as I came in...relatively uneventfully.

Joel Carboni, the YMD Central Zone leader, was present in the center. He was around a lot and helped raise me during my first formative year in Buddhism, and on a personal level I consider him a friend. He once remarked to me, (paraphrasing from memory) "Gajokai is all about, if you say you're going to do something, DO IT!" I couldn't have summarized it better myself. I always tried to bring a sense of responsibility with me on shift, because I thought it was the most important lesson I learned.

For myself, it's time I got on to other responsibilities. Given how much energy and well-being doing shift gives me, I'm glad to find the confidence that I can let go. It's time for someone else to learn the lessons I learned.

Last Free Weekend

Hiroko's mom Yasuko is about to come to town for the birth of Ren, so this is our last free weekend as a couple before we begin the new era as a family. Hiroko celebrated by going out to breakfast and dinner together, and watching a movie at home. We've never felt closer and it's like there's a sort of honeymoon sense about the relationship again. It's a funny thing, since I'm recovering from a cold, and having minor physical ailments with one eye and knee, and work is crazy, and she's got all these physiological issues. But despite that I'm overwhelmed with a stream of joy and security.

Speaking of generating joy, since Hiroko can't go down the stairs, we've moved our Omamori Gohonzon to the bedroom. For those who don't know, the Omamori is a tiny version of the Gohonzon meant primarily for travel. Having it here means Hiroko can chant where she's most comfortable, in bed.

She also plays Chuzzle all the time. And I mean ALL the time. I guess we all have our game loves. My mom plays Sudoku. My dad just plays solitaire. Joe used to play the Playstation version of Civilization 2 for hours and hours.

I'm totally in love with Battlelore. Even the small things I thought I didn't like about the game, I like after playing it a bit. The core game engine is pretty simple and open to randomness, but the possibilities and additional complexity are endless, while remaining fun. It's a very expandable game system and I look forward to diving deeper and deeper into it. I finally got a chance to show it to Mike. He also dug it a lot. When I get the chance (presumably, months from now) I'll go looking for more opponents. Really, it's a blast.

Guess it's cool my kid is just around the corner, and I can talk about having fun with my wife, and playing games.

Pics from my dad

Check out a few pictures my dad took.

Cool, Battlelore

With my wife sick, I've been spending a lot of time at home. Especially since I know I'll have little chance soon, I've really been geeking out, playing video and board games. A lot. Now I've done a lot of other stuff so it's not like I'm spending all my time getting reversed-tanned in front of an anodized tube. But in the last two weeks I've played:

Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell -- The original, purchased long ago but never played. This game is available practically free in stores, which is a good deal, because it's a whopper of a great game. Many sequels which I've yet to see. Playing this game is like being the hero of a spy novel. Highly recommended.

Prince of Persia and Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones -- These are very much like Tomb Raider. Light, simple, first person jumping puzzlers. The action is very smooth, the scenery beautiful. There's a lot of silly fighting and everything is far too easy, and there's no replay value, but these are packed with enough fun to make them more than just rentals. They have a cool love story, a real rarity in video games, and it's not just tacked on.

Spiderman 2 -- Grand Theft Auto, except you're Spiderman. It's amazingly fun and thrillingly well implemented to swing around a beautifully rendered New York. Unfortunately, there's not a lot else to do, especially for an "open-ended" title. Great game, but it could have been so much more.

But none of that matters now...Battlelore has arrived. The acclaimed new fantasy war game from Days of Wonder, it's a big fantasy battle game ala Warhammer, the 8-million pound gorilla of wargaming, except that it's got more in common with the "German games", which is to say it's quick, lighter, and playable. This game is so highly anticipated that it was rated #1 wargame of all time on BoardGameGeek the day it came out. And now it's in my living room.

Tonight...I douse myself in geekery, and light the match of...um...nerdiness.

Back in the Saddle

Rode my bicycle to work today. That's not particularly notable, except that it's the first time in two weeks I've done so, which is an awfully long stretch. It couldn't be helped. There's been doctors' appointments, a back injury, a 10-day cold, and inclement weather to avoid.

I bought my self a totally fly used fixed-gear about three months back for winter and city riding. I'll post pictures of my bikes soon. It's a perfect commuter, especially in this balmy weather. This morning it was 35 degrees and hazy...perfect bicycling weather!

Today is just about the midpoint between last year and next year's Ragbrai. It's a long way away, but the team is already starting to ramp up, talking about putting together a roster, and training and equipment for next year, and budget, and the bus, and all that. You can read about the team at our team website. I can't figure a way to get pictures off there, but here's a good pic of me with some dudes from the team.

Mr. Lion Update

Hello monkeys. Roar! Since we last spoke, the snow has come, roar. We didn't have that in Africa, Roar! Bob does not seem to like it. Especially when he has to go like he does everyday, roar. Incidentally, did you know that male lions sleep 20 hours a day, while the females do our hunting? ROAR! Also, when mating, we copulate 20-40 times a day. I would like to point out how sweet it is to be a lion, roar.

Hiroko is very big now, roar! Her belly moves on its own. I think it is the little monkey inside, roar!! I like to rub my head against it and purr. Lately all Bob and Hiroko talk about is the new monkey. Roar. They should remember they also have a lion, roar. I understand they have named the baby after a flower, roar. That is very lame. Baby needs name like Simba or Nala, roar.

Now listen, monkeys. I'd like to deviate from talking about Bob for a second. Last time I told you to send food, roar. Even stuffed lions need to eat, roar. You do not want to get on my bad side, roar. I am two and a half inches of pure muscle. ROAR!!

Oh right...

With the Marquis trade, I almost forgot to mention a couple other moves. The Cubs signed Daryle Ward, a pretty good veteran first baseman. He can play off the bench or fill in Derrek Lee.
Pros: If we don't need him he'll be good trade bait, and if we do, it'll be $1 million well-spent insurance. Good deal.
Cons: Not particularly good at anything, except batting average. No experience as pinch hitter. No utility.
Wild Card: In 2004, he hit for the cycle for Pittsburg. With father Gary, they're the only father-son pair to do so.

Also, the Cubs gave away Freddie Bynum, to free a slot on the roster prior to a rule-5 draft. He was one of the fourth or fifth stringers who got to play last year when the Cubs had about 75 injured players. He was kinda fast. He won't really be missed.

Marquis de Sade

Over the weekend, the Cubs signed Jason Marquis, continuing their trend of overpaying for washed-up third-tier talent. To avoid confusion and ambiguity, please not the following:
* Jason is not Jeff Suppan, the other Cardinals pitcher on the free agent market. That guy can pitch.
* Jason is also not the Marquis de Sade, although beat writers' review of his play over the last two seasons has also featured references to torture and pornography.
* Jason is also not the Mercury Grand Marquis, although it was also constructed in St. Louis until it got shipped out when it got too expensive.
* His name is pronounced "marquee" as in, "Is certainly not a marquee player."

Pros: Somehow managed to bat .310 in 2005, which would give him a better batting average than last year's entire Cubs lineup. Seriously.
Cons: Hasn't pitched well in 2 years. Last year he was the worst full-season pitcher in baseball. And then the Cubs gave him a huge raise. No one anywhere knows why.
Wild Card: Strict Jewish. There's got to be a joke in there somewhere.

Mr. Lion and Me

This is my favorite photo, and the one that appears in my profile. It's a picture of myself late on the wedding day with my best friend, Mr. Lion. He's been with us since I met him at FNCC in 2004 and brought him back to Illinois.

This picture was taken by Laura Hamm-Goetchell, our wedding photographer. She was great.

Lilly Livered

Pitches from Lilly made my life so wonderful
Pitches from Lilly helped me sleep at night
Pitches from Lilly solved my childhood problems
Pitches from Lilly helped me feel alright
-- The Who (well, more or less)

Ok, so let's face it, for the last three years, the Cubs have been a mercenary team. Each year they've tried to buy themselves a title, Yankees-style, and each year they've been a little (okay, a lot) worse. They must be asking themselves, how much money does it take to win a title?

This year, after firing the management and facing a mass player exodus, they answered themselves: $136 million. That's how much they threw at Alfonso Soriano. Signing him made the Cubs a draw again. If the team's press releases are to be believed, Soriano's 9 1/2 feet tall, spits fire at opposing pitchers, and can hit home runs using only his mind. Anyway, it seems to have worked, because the other players have found faith. In a single week and for $230 million, the Cubs signed or re-signed Soriano, Ramirez, Miller, Blanco, Zambrano, Cotts, and DeRosa.

So fear not, Cubs fans! With a budget the size of Jim Hendry's heart condition, the franchise has created...er...well, pretty much the same sucky team as last year. PLUS SORIANO!! YEAH!!

One big problem though: we blew our whole wad and forgot to get a pitching staff. Is that important?

Thus, Ted Lilly.
Pros: He was available. Oh, and he's consistent. He'll pitch the whole season. Versus, say, coming down with a cold that keeps him from playing. Or developing some mysterious shoulder condition which benches him but lets him party 'till dawn all over town. Oh, and he's a lefty with variety and velocity. That's sorta good.
Cons: We gave him a 250% pay raise, so he'd better work out, because he'll be hard to dump. Oh, and he's completely unsuited for Wrigley. He's a popup pitcher who gives up a lot of walks, and has control/consistency problems. He needs a big field with no wind. Er...uh oh.
Wild Card: He's been called "uncoachable". For example, last August when Athletics manager John Gibbons went to pull him from the mound, Lilly drew him into a fistfight, bloodying his nose. Boy, good thing Lou Pinella's so cool-headed, right? Er...right?
"You don't know where I been, Lou! You don't know where I've been!" -- Tyler Durden

Goodbye, Gajokai

I joined the Soka Gakkai and became a buddhist four years ago. I'm a happier stabler, more productive person because of it. Moreover, I believe to some small degree, the world has become a better place.

Since day one, I was in a program called "Gajokai", which is Japanese for "teeth of the castle". It's a volunteer program for young men to do security and service at the community centers where we practice. Two years ago I got put in charge of running the program for Chicago, which means handling the local community center, and a few other off-site events, such as our annual participation in the Pride Parade, etc.

Every day for two years I've sweated making sure the center gets opened and closed, and making sure there's always someone behind the desk to greet people, keep the environment clean and friendly, answer questions and phones, maintain the schedule, and a gazillion other tasks. I've done this on a rotation of about 15 guys (plus 20 more assistants) covering about 50 shifts a month. With nothing driving us but pride, we've kept it together, and also generated growth, development, camaraderie, and prayer.

I have got so much out of the experience, and of the hundreds of hours I've mopped and cleaned and planned and sweated, it was all worth it. Conspicuously, I learned critical job skills (management, customer service) and met my wife through the program. Inconspicuously, I've grown by becoming comfortable with using my life as a platform to care for and develop those around me. Plus somewhere along the line I got a lot of lessons in humility.

I'll be leaving the program behind, hopefully in good hands, in about 10 days. There was a time when it could be my number one focus, but now I've got a family to take care of. That's a whole new horizon, but the steady faith and steady practice that Gajokai has drilled into me makes it a challenge I'm sure I can handle.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Bob.

Chess Computers Rule the World

I've got so much to talk about on this blog that I don't know where to start. Seems kind of odd to just jump right in with a post about chess, but there it is.

"From the indigo, an even deeper blue." -- Buddhist aphorism

Back in 1997, IBM built a chess-playing computer named Deep Blue and won a match against raining world champion Garry Kasparov. It was such a huge event at the time that social knowledge spilled over past the nerd world. Ask normal people to name two things that ever happened in chess, and they'll probably name the "Match of the Century" and this.

Why was it so important? Because it was the first instance of a computer being able to beat the best player in the world. Subsequently the IBM team would be accused by Kasparov and others of cheating. Although some of the more grandiose claims are unsubstantiated, everyone agreed that IBM hadn't really built a computer to be good at chess in general, but to be good at beating Garry Kasparov. Specifically, they analyzed Kasparov's games, found his weaknesses, and biased the computer to favor lines to exploit those weaknesses. Kasparov wasn't given a chance to analyze Deep Blue's games, so the match up wasn't really fair.

Flash forward almost 10 years later, and computers are routinely beating up humans. No one even argues the point anymore; computers are simply better. After every serious match most humans play, they immediately turn to computers to analyze the game and tell them where they went wrong.

How good are the computers? This week a computer program played a tournament against the new world champion, Kramnik. You might have heard about Kramnik; he made front pages during his title match in October because his opponent accused him of cheating, because he went to the bathroom too much. America snoozes about such chess trivia, but the rest of the world watches closely.

This new program, Deep Fritz, easily beat Kramnik. It wasn't even a match; Kramnik didn't win a single game. Which is bad for humans, because this is what he had to say before the tournament: "The day will come when we will no longer have a chance against computers. If I indeed manage to beat Fritz in this match it will probably be the last time that a human being wins against a computer." Uh oh.

But what really makes Deep Fritz amazing is that you can buy it off the shelf, and run it in your own home.

Humanity has made itself obsolete.

A Special Message From Mr. Lion

Hello everyone, Roar!! I'm Mr. Lion, Roar! I'm Bob's best friend and #1 chief lion of this house ROOOAR! Bob is also my favorite monkey as well. Whenever there is a mouse or elk or...let's see... elephant or....water buffalo...or...um...wildebeest...which needs to be slaughtered, or a naptime which needs to be napped, I am ready to handle it like only the king of the jungle could, roar! Also I am cute. Roar.

You will have to come back to Bob's blog if you want to get updates on me roar. I promise to tell you all about my best naptimes, snoozes in the sun, and...ummm...other stuff that I do. That I can't tell you about right now but it's really interesting, and you could be scared by all...um...

Anyway, I have been living with Bob a long time and I can tell you all about him. ROAR! Ok, so, every day we get up together and say hi to his wife, then I go back to bed. Then later I get up and he comes home, roar. I don't really know where he goes all day, but I don't think he likes it. Then he comes home and does some stuff...I don't really pay attention, roar. Then he goes to sleep, where I'm usually at, and we talk a while. Roar.

There used to be a taller, redheaded monkey around here as well. I miss him sometimes, roar. And Africa, I really miss Africa. Also Bob and Hiroko are breeding now, roar. Which is pretty typical of the monkeys I know...ROAR!

I lead a pretty good life considering I'm only a stuffed lion, roar!! Thank you monkeys for your time. Send food.