Hello monkeys. Roar! Since we last spoke, the snow has come, roar. We didn't have that in Africa, Roar! Bob does not seem to like it. Especially when he has to go like he does everyday, roar. Incidentally, did you know that male lions sleep 20 hours a day, while the females do our hunting? ROAR! Also, when mating, we copulate 20-40 times a day. I would like to point out how sweet it is to be a lion, roar.Hiroko is very big now, roar! Her belly moves on its own. I think it is the little monkey inside, roar!! I like to rub my head against it and purr. Lately all Bob and Hiroko talk about is the new monkey. Roar. They should remember they also have a lion, roar. I understand they have named the baby after a flower, roar. That is very lame. Baby needs name like Simba or Nala, roar.
Now listen, monkeys. I'd like to deviate from talking about Bob for a second. Last time I told you to send food, roar. Even stuffed lions need to eat, roar. You do not want to get on my bad side, roar. I am two and a half inches of pure muscle. ROAR!!
3 comments:
Hey Mr. Lion,
Good job jumping back and forth from the keys to type your messages. I am very impressed.
I am also impressed that you know how to read. I think most lions can't do this, right?
We don't have elk here, Mr. Lion. How about a bear or a baby seal?
Actually, Mr. Lion can speak, but he definitely can't read or write. He's not allowed to use the computer because we end up with cat hair between the keys. Sometimes he likes to sleep on top of the laptop when it's warm though.
I don't know how his posts are ending up here, actually. It's some kind of stuffed-creature magic, I suppose.
Hello monkey girl! I am please to recieve your message, ROAR!
Do not listen to Bob, roar. I can definitely read, roar! Just the other day I was reading... um... book... about... things. Is too important to tell monkey, roar.
As for speaking, do not be silly, roar. Anyone who has seen "The Lion King" knows that lions can definitely talk. Roar!
Hunting baby seal is no good, roar. Let's just say, water and Mr. Lion do not get along. Roar! Learned my lesson.
Bears are too tough meat, roar. Also they are sort of my friends, roar. I could of course hunt them if I wanted to though. I am very tough lion who can kill bear. Roar!!
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